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start doing
I have felt a bit stuck lately…stuck in my own mind. Like a ton of ideas are rolling and exciting me in my brain but I can’t seem to move from that space with them. It’s a bit paralyzing. I am a creator, a doer…one that loves generating new and fresh spaces. This is a new place for me to be-it’s like writers block but not. It’s all up there, my next steps for this space of mine, it’s just frozen. I have been frozen, in taking that next small step forward.
I posted this amazing quote that popped in my IG feed today -START DOING. Start somewhere. Brain dumping imperfect ideas, writing in imperfect sentences…just get it out. I think my biggest barrier has been my own self, in wanting to get this next step for torrechadwick out just right on the first try. That is not how I have ever worked…the creative process takes time. It takes throwing out ALL the ideas and then narrowing it all down to the deep root of what will be.
The answers will come in the doing. There is so much truth in that…standing on the outside holding onto everything tightly, safely is not where it all happens. I must push out of that space and just start.
This applies to all the things, right?
START DOING…doing the miles, doing the workout, doing the studying, the hard things, the scary things, the way outside of the box things. Once you stop waiting and start doing you can live in the magic. What have I been waiting for? What are you waiting for?
START DOING.
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fresh start
This new year brought the urge to restart. To move where my heart and head have been pulling me for a long time. It is hard to let go of something that has been created from scratch, from thoughts and dreams…Chadwick Home came during a huge transition in my life. A time where I had been let go from a job I truly loved, working with people I trusted who I had let into my life in all ways. The ending of that job was an unexpected gut punch and was handled inappropriately by leadership. I walked away angry, hurt and heartbroken.
Grieving that loss took time. In that time I realized going back to work for someone else was not in my emotional capacity. It was time to take a leap and create something of my own. Something I could be in my own world with, in my own skin and run my own race…the risk in my mind, was well worth the reward.
Chadwick Home took shape through lots of brainstorming, chatting with my closest humans and many drafts of plans. It was a blend of all the things that I love, a way to create and a way to make a living using my own narrative not anyone else’s.
This new venture, this new love was hard to put out into the world…there was something so incredibly vulnerable about clicking publish. Chadwick Home then became open to all the people and all the things-which of course was the end goal but it felt so hard to let it fly. How would this new buisness be seen out in the world? How would I be seen? Will it work? Will it make sense? Will it be a success? Risk vs reward.
Over the years the reward was extensive and y’all took Chadwick Home in and supported my dream. Ahhh…for that I could not be more grateful! The gifts and boxes I created were never as big as the gifts that came back to me through you.
In the last 12 months I started noticing a shift in me, in my passions, in my creativity and at times lack there of. I felt stagnant and couldn’t figure out how to pull myself to a new level conceptually. I need that challenge, to me it is always important to be fresh, new and work outside of the box. I am not one to follow the crowd in my ideas, I want to be the leader of the crowd. I noticed the box market and its saturation and felt that as a business. I noticed myself sharing/talking more about fitness, running and sport than my product/home/lifestyle. I clearly was feeling more at home in that space than within the space I had originally created.
I kept in the cozy of the Chadwick Home space and fought that strong call for change for a while. I was changing, my heart, my being was changing. What I valued, what I wanted to put out to you…to share in community with you was changing. I needed to stop fighting the flood of all the things and actually change.
Once I made the decision to re-brand, everything came rushing to me-like at warp speed. The name, the logo, the direction and purpose. I felt the flame of excitement once again…that risk vs reward playing strong in my heart. This is me, I am fitting in the box where I used to feel so awkward in.
torrechadwick is me, is where I am right in this moment of life. It is where my heart beats. To inspire. To be inspired. Women to women. Girl to girl. To live bold, big and to take up space. Living life brightly, shining in who you are. My goal: to celebrate women and girls with unconditional support. To champion self care, growth and the athlete in all.
The scaffolding is up on this re-brand and I am working hard at developing its framing and structure…that comes with intentional thought and time. I have a strong hold on this but have lots of questions to ask and research to do…I want to give you the very best of me and I know that being a lifelong learner is the way to make that happen.
Fresh start. New perspective. I am here and ready…moving forward one step at a time.
